Monday, January 08, 2007

What really matters

I received an e-mail from a man whose name I did not recognize. Normally in this circumstance, I delete the e-mail or click the "Report as Spam" button, so I don't receive so many spam e-mails.

This particular e-mail's subject line caught my eye. "Question about a Blogger Entry" is what was written. I thought, well, maybe it's about Dribblings. I'll check it out.

Here's what the e-mail said:

Mr. Dorn,

I was looking for an old friend through Google and one of the results was your entry about a woman named Jenny Patek. That is the same name of the woman I am looking for. Do you happen to know if your Jenny lived in Medina, NY in 1995 and in Knoxville, TN before that? The description in the 15 Feb 05 entry sounds just like the woman I'm looking for. I'm sorry for your loss.


The 15 Feb 05 entry can be found here:

So what was I to do? My friend Jenny Patek was possibly the Jenny Patek he was looking for. It wouldn't be right for him to find out about her death via blog, would it? I decided to e-mail him back.


It's possible that Jenny lived in Medina and Knoxville. She was Italian, 28, about 5'2", feisty, fun, and full of life. She had brown slightly wavy hair and always wore an "Italian Horn" necklace.

I'm from Waukesha, WI and she and I had become friends through a mutual job at a liquor store here. She lived in Waukesha. She took her own life a few days before I wrote the blog.

Does this sound like her? I hope this helps.

All the best,

I hoped it was not the Jenny he was looking for. I actually was worried for a while, until I received his follow-up.


I just got an email from my Jenny Patek. She got married, changed her last name and started using her full name.

Seeing that a woman with the same name as one of my old friends had died really shocked me and made me realize what the people who have been in my life really mean to me. I've started contacting my friends (old and new) and I plan to make sure they know just how much they mean and/or meant to me before it is too late. Once again, I'm sorry for your friends loss, but it has helped me realize what really matters in life... the relationships we have with the people in our lives. Thank you!


I was and am very relieved that Jeffrey found the Jenny Patek he was looking for. It's of course selfish of me to say that I wish my friend Jenny hadn't done what she has done, but I digress.

I believe that Jeffrey is right - the relationships with the people in our lives really matters the most. I'm happy to have all of you in mine.